“Baby Fat”??

Dear Drew Magary,

Most of us grow out of 5^th grade name calling by the end of 5^th grade. Clearly, you are still waiting for your balls to drop so you can grow a pair and advance to same the level of name calling as the average 6^th grader.

(Magary is a Deadspin Columnist. He enjoys hating on all aspects of sports. My first guess is that he wasn’t the cool or coordinated athlete during any point of his life. He recently wrote an article “Why Your Team Sucks: 2015” where he gives his break down of the specific team. His rant is fueled with so much hate for any and all subjects associated with the Washington Redskins. Here’s what Magary had to say about Coach Jay Gruden.)

Jay Gruden, who is a boob. Let’s all enjoy Baby Fat’s final year as a head coach before he gets shitcanned and spends the rest of his career as a QB coach in the ACC.

(First, I’m going to ignore the ACC comment. That kind of trash talk will get you a fat lip. Gruden is definitely an SEC stud.)

“Boob”? You just called a grown man a “boob”. Most men who have reached puberty understand the word ‘boob’ to be associated with objects that they can’t wait to touch. I’ve never heard of a child or an adult try to insult or pick on another person by calling them a “boob”. How old are you, Drew? Have you ever seen boobs? I’m guessing by this lame name-calling your interactions with boobs are on the same level as the Redskins win-loss record, if not worse for you.

“Baby Fat”? You just referred to Coach Gruden as “Baby Fat”. WHAT THE BLEEP IS WRONG WITH YOU? Forget stupidity, that’s a given. Yes, Jay has an adorable baby face that has aged very well. I just saw Jay in person and if anything he looks thin. Sure, maybe last year he had few extra pounds to keep him warm in the winter. But now, there is no “baby fat’ on Jay. He looks great! The man is 6’2 and weighs 225 pounds; that’s the definition of a MAN! Maybe you’re a little jealous because he gives off that laid back swag with his innocent baby face you wished you had.

Truth be told, he can throw a cold one back faster than you could order your Malibu and pineapple. Does Jay’s manliness remind you of someone that you will never be; a real man? What adult male who is paid for his words can only come up with “baby fat”?

HE’S NOT EVEN FAT!!!!! Come on, little guy! If you’re going to verbally throw jabs and I’m confident my jab would hit harder than yours, you gotta do better than that. We’re talking about the Redskins, a team and franchise that is an open door to point and laugh at and the only adjectives you can think of are “baby fat”??

Or did you mean to say Jay is “Phat”? My employees taught me that cool kids use ‘phat’ when they want to say “awesome”. In that case, yes, Jay is bleeeping awesome!

I’m a life long Redskins fan and I can make fun of the Redskins and laugh at all the jokes with Dallas fans. But you are paid to hate the Redskins and all you got is “baby fat”??? Do you see a therapist about your self-esteem? Have you ever talked to a professional about body issues? I feel sorry for those that have to interact with you on a daily basis. Do you call everyone fat? I hope your distortion of body image doesn’t give the women in your life a serious complex.

If you’re going to make fun of the Redskins at least do it with a pair of (fully inflated) balls and up your name-calling. And just a reminder, for someone who publicly admitted to being overweight and posted a food journal online to help with your food struggle, it seems like you of all people would be more understanding of the word “fat”. Some of us are funny assholes and you are just a struggling bully. Get well soon.

Sincerely,

Alison St.Clair